John Conner Lost His Wife And Daughter To Breast Cancer — Now He Fights For Caregivers

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, a time when pink ribbons, charity walks, and fundraising campaigns >breast cancer and its impact. Many of us wear pink to honor the loved ones who have survived the disease and remember those we’ve lost.

While the focus this month is rightly on awareness and prevention, the caregivers often remain in the background. They quietly manage appointments, offer comfort, and shoulder the weight of the fight, all while keeping their households running.

For John Conner, supporting caregivers became a central part of his calling. In 2005, he co-founded Praise Is The Cure with his wife, Anita Conner, and daughter, Kerri Conner Matchett. This non-profit’s mission is to offer education in the Black community about breast cancer, promote early detection, and connect people with much-needed resources.

In 1997, when his wife was diagnosed, she became involved with the Susan G. Komen for the Cure organization. According to John, she learned that “Although Black women were being diagnosed at a much lower rate than other ethnic groups, they were dying at a higher rate.” They formed Praise Is The Cure to help educate Black women about breast cancer and to provide resources to make treatment more accessible. “I got involved in it by just following around with them and doing what I was told to do.”

Before Praise Is The Cure became a movement of nearly 45,000 members, it was the dream of John’s wife and daughter. Both women navigated advanced breast cancer diagnoses, and they were forces of determination.

John first met his wife when they were both in the ninth grade. What started as a friendship bloomed into a high school romance and eventually marriage. While they shared what he calls a storybook romance, Anita became pregnant with their first child, Kerri, while still in high school. A life event that could have derailed her dreams later became part of her testimony as she mentored young women as a certified public accountant. “Nita took that baby to school with her,” John says. “She was able to pledge a sorority and became part of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority Inc. She graduated from Drexel University with honors and ended up working for Price Waterhouse, a major accounting firm at the time.”

According to John, Anita went on to build her own million-dollar accounting firm and became one of the top financial advisors in the Philadelphia area. Kerri followed in her footsteps and eventually became a partner in the company after graduating from Howard University.

In 1997, when Anita was diagnosed, John says, “It caught us by surprise.” He admits that they knew very little about the disease. Anita went on to get stem-cell treatment, and her cancer was in remission for 21 years before returning as metastatic.

Their daughter was diagnosed a decade later. “So, I was dealing with two women who were the most important in my life at the same time,” John says. “Kerri was married, and her husband played a really important role in caring for her, but she was still my daughter.”

John describes the emotional toll. “I was experiencing all kinds of things that I didn’t really understand. I went through periods of loneliness and even guilt, because I couldn’t do anything to really help them.”

Sadly, Kerri passed away in 2022. “The grief was overwhelming for me,” he says. In response, he expanded the caretaker’s program to include support for men’s mental health. “If we can’t take care of ourselves, we certainly can’t take care of our loved ones.”

This past August, Anita also passed away from the disease. The losses have been devastating, but instead of allowing grief to consume him, John has chosen to honor their legacy by continuing the work they began together.

This year was the 20th anniversary of Praise Is The Cure’s annual Hope, Health, and Healing event. The celebration included a survivor’s pamper party, a concert, a mobile mammography screening station, and a men’s health forum. Despite losing his wife only two months prior, John insisted that the event continue as planned.

“I’m trying to get across to men that we need to take care of not only our physical health, but our mental health,” he explains. “That’s what I’m trying to accomplish every year. A lot of them, even when they’re having mental issues, will not go to see a counselor because they look at it as a sign of weakness.”

When asked what keeps him motivated, John tearfully replies, “Nita told me before she left here to be strong and have courage. So, that’s what I’m doing. Until I leave this earth, I will work to keep that mission. We’re losing our Black women. I lost two women that I love more than anything in this world. Every day that I wake up, I think about them, and I’m going to think about what I can do to keep Praise Is The Cure alive. There are a lot of men out there going through the same thing that I’m going through.”

Learn more about Praise Is The Cure at praiseisthecure.org.

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